The Absolutely Best Advice On Getting Older. Seriously.

This isn’t profound advice, but it makes me laugh.

I was listening to a book on CD yesterday during our long ride home from Tampa Bay. It’s our common practice; it does help the miles slip past. I’d chosen Yes, Please by actor, writer and comedian Amy Poehler.

The whole book is a delight, a memoir mixed with comedy, benign gossip, and self-help. Her take on aging made me laugh and reflect. I think she’s got it.

Here are some of the best nuggets about growing older:

  • Invisibility and the benefits thereof. “Getting older makes you somewhat invisible. This can be exciting… This can lead to your finding a comfortable couch at a party, or to the realizing that you are at a terrible party and need to leave immediately… You can witness young people embarrassing themselves and get a thrill that it’s not you.”
  • Take advice from your 90-year-old self.  E.g.,  “Get to the point please,” “Isn’t dancing fun?” “You are gorgeous!” “Kiss every baby and pet every dog,” “Make ‘No’ a complete sentence,” and finally, “That next-door neighbor is too loud; that’s it, I’m calling the cops.”
  • Relax and don’t fight so hard. “Fighting aging is like the War on Drugs. It’s expensive, does more harm than good, and has been proven to never end.”
  • Be grateful you’re still here. “Stop whining about getting old. It’s a privilege. A lot of people who are dead wish they were still alive.”
  • Enjoy your powers.”Getting older also helps you develop X-ray vision. The strange thing is that the moment people start looking at you less is when you start being able to see through people more.”
  • Don’t make beauty or youth your currency.  “Decide what your currency is early. Let go of what you will never have. People who do this are happier and sexier.
  • My random favorite. “Nobody looks stupid when they are having fun.”

Stay fabulous,



Browse some of the goodies we can enjoy till we’re 90:

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patti

One Comment

  1. What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I&8l;172#l have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words.

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